This dude @MiguelUnlimited should’ve called this the “All The Fine Ass Women In A 60 Mile Radius” tour cuz they were in there tonight. The Wilbur Theater in Boston was like the site of a beautiful woman convention. In support of his new album Kaleidoscope Dream he put on a masterful show. But my time at his show got me in a reflective state. That R&B overdose will do that to you if your not careful. So in between jotting notes on my review of his dope show I let my mind wander and create the foundation of what would become a Twitter rant. And now its brought to you here in the over 140 characters edition. Here are the 5 quick observations that I made while at the Boston stop of Miguel’s tour.
1. Dudes with these fedoras are out here STILL winning. You gotta have a hat perched on your dreads like old school will.i.am to get a bad one in these days and times? Man that don’t match. Nobody but Frank Sinatra can be taken seriously in one of those things. But what do I know? I saw about 6 of the most beautiful women in the building being escorted by cats walking around looking like Ne-Yo’s low rent cousin. I don’t get it. Count me out if that’s the uniform.
2. Not being a jerk to venue staff will lead you to a life of no waiting in lines. A quiet word to a staff member and a pleasant demeanor mixed with an air of authority will get you farther than all that grandstanding. Remember that rookie.
3. Gentlemen, fine women begat fine women. Keep them around you and more shall appear. You will be amazed at how handsome you become with a lovely lady by your side. Am I lying ladies? Y’all know you are wondering “Why is she with him? She might be on to something”. Dysfunctional? Yes. But is effective? That would be a HELL YES.
4. Ladies the level of behavior you’re accepting is out of hand. You let him smash but he’s letting you get bounced around in a club like a hockey puck and that’s ok? Hell naw. Quit checking his shoes and start checking his morals. That’s just something that I have noticed talking to women. Its sad. Their expectation is that we will not speak up for them or safe guard them in public. They almost expect that they are on their own even when escorted. I open doors and get looked at like an alien from the planet “New Negro”. That happens because you let that bullshxt slide. A lot of poor vagina management going on out here.
5. Conversely. Gentlemen if she’s with you its kinda your job to see she makes it home in one piece. No one’s saying you gotta jump in front of a speeding train like Superman but damn man at least offer your arm as she tries to negotiate stairs in those 6 inch stilettos you love so much. Especially if you are trying to get them up in the air later. A little chivalry goes far.